Friends, this is my new goldfish. I have named him or her Jesus Yahweh Mahomet Visnu Smythe. The reason I have done this is that, if there is reincarnation or life after death for fish, I want to give my beautiful finned friend the best chance for a successful transition by naming him after certain popular Gods.
Now, in doing this I may have inadvertently offended certain folk (like the English teacher in Sudan). This was not my intention. However there may be those among you who feel I should be punished. If there are, which punishment do you think best suits my crime?
1. Forty lashes with an unsterilized camel whip.
2. Being beaten to death with a large pork chop.
3. Partial crucifixion (to only half my body - the right half of course).
4. Being stoned (no, not with drugs - with heavy, pointy things!).Do you have other options that seem more appropriate given the seriousness of my unintentional crime? Do you think my goldfish, thus named, has a more hopeful destiny? Should I think of a nickname for him or her? Should I go into hiding immediately in case a fatwah has been issued?
Photo Link.
9 comments:
I think you are okay with the name, but if you had named him Jesus Christ, Michelle Malkin and BillO would probably be filming your house and bugging you.
I'm not so sure, Patricia! I thought I heard some strange noises outside my house last night.
If I suddenly go off air, you'll know what happened. Farewell!
Ha, ha, the Gods Must Be Crazy? ' (
It's more likely to be us humans, Coffee!
Pray to Jesus, God, Buddha, Allah, Krishna, Britney Spears (Or Whoever You Worship)… that you will not be smote for your blasphemy.
Myself, I'd play it safe and name the little fishy "Orangie". Or is little fishy more of a "Salmony"? Yeah, that's the ticket, his name should be Salmony Fishdie.
Very clever, Big Fella. Please call again!
well...since said Fishie will eventually go to the Big Toilet Bowl in the Sky....I guess a Swirlie would be appropriate punishment....but since you named her, and not a teddy bear....I think you are okay....and do not need to be punished...such bizarre times- a woman gets punished for being abducted and raped, and is to be violently punished and a woman teaches young children and lets them name God-forbid- a Teddy bear....and she is to be punished for her "crime"......What the????
Maybe the Fishies know what the ????
lovely little fish....may your life be long and full of love and NO cats....
( because here that is what her name would be "Dinner" or "hmmmm, Tasty"....
Sort of looks like Peter Costello and 'Aqua Cat'Gillard's tail is twitching.....:)and therein lays and etc:
Isn't the fish a symbol of Christ?
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