Sunday, February 04, 2007


Now listen up, Friends. A thought has crossed my mind that 'perhaps' should be shared with you. It's about a topic that is rather personal, perhaps even a 'minor' topic, but one that might just explain a lot of things.

The light shone for me when I was thinking about global warming. I was trying to fit the coming horrors of climate change in with the imminent danger of nuclear war in the Middle East, trying to work out which is worse. Then I asked myself why George is deciding on such a plan when the world is already well on the path to Hellfire.

Then it came to me: our George doesn't want some fancy trick from nature to dim his light! He has decided if nature can warm things up, then he'll go a few steps better. He's going to drop some nukes and really give the world a marshmallow roast or a mass barbie (depending on how you look at it) that they'll never forget, one that will linger on for a few millennia.

Then I asked myself why any person in their right mind would do such a thing: try to match nature or even beat it. Of course that's a silly question because the world knows that George's mind is not quite right. Just look at the Bushisms each time you visit Seeking Utopia to see what I mean. But John thinks George is the Second Coming, no pun intended. Then John's mind is not quite right either!

Then the answer came to me in a flash (sorry I don't have a photo of George flashing to prove my point)! It's entirely possible that George has a small dick (one that matches his brain).

Now men with small dicks have always had a problem (at least in their own mind). Small men have similar problems. In order to make up for how nature has shortchanged them, they tend to over-compensate, try to act bigger than they are. So in the midst of global warming, George has decided to throw a blasted tantrum (following his recent loss of both Houses), one that ensures he remains on the world's centre stage for at least the next few months. What a smalltime loser!

Now I think it would be much cheaper if all the nations of the world threw in a few millions bucks and paid for George to have a penile enhancement, don't you! I mean, if he really wants it, perhaps even an organ that required its own float to carry it around. Surely that would be better than WW3?

Perhaps readers of this blog, an astute group, might be willing to throw in some money to the "GET GEORGE A BIGGER DICK BEFORE HE BLOWS UP THE WORLD" FUND.

Of course, some might say that Cheney already is a bigger Dick and that Bush's Dick controls him completely (as is the case with most men)!



Coffee Messiah said...

Regardless, GW should be sent to the Wizard for a Brain.

It's obvious he certainly doesn't have one that functions! ; (

Daniel said...

You can't get a brain into a skull that's solid bone, CM!

bluegrrrrl said...

Interesting theory, Daniel, and no doubt you're right...I have always thought that his anatomy must account for some of his mental and emotional shortcomings. But, petite penis or not, I think our Little Napoleon just needs to get laid. I'd throw in a $20 for that. Not that I really want to think about the man in that way (in fact, the thought makes me want to hurl), but surely releasing all that repressed sexual energy would calm him down and save the world from an even bigger bloodbath. Maybe we can find him a hooker who's willing to tell him over and over what an enormous penis he has. He's very impressionable (when it's a message he wants to hear, anyway). Just might work.

Daniel said...

I agree he needs to get laid! Laid to rest, that is.

Thanks for dropping by. Cheers.

L. Sparrow said...


Any post that starts out as "Now listen up, Friends"... always proves to be entertaining...

I personally am not even going to entertain any thoughts about size, quality or texture of said president's ..... member ....


my imagination is too fertile ...
wait a minute who is that? Goodness Gracious it's Monica Lewinsky AGAIN! She's a president groupy .... :)

Daniel said...

With George of the Peti-peni, he's not going to harm-monica! Cheers!

Zoe said...

Now Listen Up Friends.....I'm not getting into this silly debate, I'm just gonna sit back and laugh until I cry! LOL

Zoe xxx

Daniel said...

Glad I could make someone's life a little happier, Zoe! xxxxx

Zoe said...

Not only have you made it happier, Dan, you give me strength, courage, hope and friendship. You are worth your weight in the FINEST gold and LAPIS LAZULI (My Fave!)

Zoe xxx